Nineteenish hours from now...

The countdown begins... In roughly nineteen hours from now, as I type this out, I will have accomplished one of my dreams. At the second largest baptist church in Canada, sitting at 1636 people who consider themselves part of the Grandview family (as of October 18, 2006), I have been given the privilege to lead worship for them. I've led worship at other places before, but nothing of this caliber. After joining the church and interning there since September, I have been given quite a few responsibilities. I've learned so many things and even as a student at Heritage College I'm able to apply the textbook knowledge to this church.

Tomorrow is so nerve-racking. I'm feeling the stress and people have continually told me "Just give it up to God and don't worry about it!" or "You'll be fine, you were given the chance because we trust you will be amazing!" It is encouraging and concurrently feels like there is more pressure because they are assuming that I will be great. It's a lot to live up to, at least for me. My other problem is the first comment people have made. "Just give it up to God!" Easier said than done, right? When you are so used to dealing with things on your own, like studying and making sure you know it all for a mid term or like making sure that you have everything is appropriately lined up for work proposal or a meeting that you are in charge of. There is a lot of time and work put in, so how do you just give it up? I don't know. I'm sure I'll figure that out soon enough. Tomorrow seems like it will be the day to fully comprehend that.

There is a lot to consider going into creating a service and after a lot of debating of what and where things should be, it was all finalized monday morning. There are two worship sets, with the offering, a baptism, prayer focus, and the teaching in between. I'm doing all the transitional talks and prayers and I'm scared about how it will flow. (ASIDE: I don't like to think of the prayers as a transitional tool, but for flow of the service it does help. It provides the band with a way for getting off or on stage without much notification to the congregation or time being wasted.) As I was going through the song lists I was continually doubting what I wanted, but I knew I wanted one song, Mighty to Save, and thankfully Grandview had just added that as one of the new songs on their repertoire list for 2007. I'll explain my love for this song after the worship sets that are in the following list:

Set 1:
All the Earth Will Sing Your Praises by Paul Baloche
Mighty to Save by Hillsong United (the new one)
Mighty to Save (reprise during offering)

Set 2:
Offering by Paul Baloche
How Great is Our God by Chris Tomlin
Holy is the Lord by Chris Tomlin
You are Holy by Michael W. Smith

So let me talk about this new song, Mighty to Save, by Hillsong United. If you haven't heard it yet, you are definitely missing out. look at the lyrics under "song of the month" and if you want I'll totally send you the song. It has this sweet A/B/C# guitar riff right at the start of the song. After 4 bars of the drummer giving a one-two-three-four beat on the high hat, he jumps in with some awesome drumming of 16ths on the high hat and snare. This has started me down the road of truly appreciating the talent that drummers have even more. Two bars later the band slowly enters in. At this point, listen to the second guitar that comes in and its effect pedals. The song begins to sound so SWEET!

After a few more bars the lyrics begin, but the song still remains quite soft. The chorus approaches and the instrumentalists crescendo and quickly decrescendo keeping the essence of a quiet praise song. Head through verse two and then the chorus. This is when the band begins to hit it hard. The song now has gone from the quiet subtlety of a prayer inside to aloud worship and praise making you feel His mightiness. The bridge then begins powerfully with lyrics of "Shine your light and let the whole world see/ We're singing for the glory of the Risen King/ Jesus." And then we go through a chorus a few more times and then the bridge a few more times until the end of the of the song.

This song has become one of my favourites, as I am sure it as and will for many others. It is strong lyrically with a feeling of how mighty our God truly is. Hillsongs has been so influential in the way praise and worship is done nowadays. They continually reinvent themselves and create such amazing songs. Now I'm not saying that every song is a big hit like Mighty to Save, but I think they have put the talents God has given them to great use. Starting out as a small band who just made music to bring praise to God and from that love for God evolving us into this new generation of music, where we can be relevant to the secular world of music around us. To be relevant for the non-Christians around us, is what I want to be part of. We cannot reach others if we cannot relate to them.

How ended up talking about how Hillsongs has revolutionized Christian worship songs for the new generation I will never know. Although, I'm glad I did because it has made me realize that no matter how scared I am and nervous about a situation like this I am still thinking of how much God can do and remove our fears if we just bring the praise back to Him. I guess me spending this time writing all of this out has just made me relax more. I've brought the thinking process out on "paper" and I've realized that it is in His hands. I want tomorrow to be amazing not to show myself off or say "what a good job I've done," but to be a tool for God to show others how awesome He is. That in everything I do I can try my hardest so I can give him true praise. And so that he can use me, a scared, nervous kid who loves praising Him, to help let His light shine to the world.

L8s, latex, and all that love stuff
nathizz

My Pick of Pics

He's a photographer by the name of Stoffel De Roover. He was experimenting with smoke and how freely it moves. I love these shots... that are just so WOWing.



















This one is called "Smoke Creature - Black".



This is titled "Smoke-induced Hallucination"

Those are just two of the few I have seen.... WOW... I think they are incredible I want to be able to get a sharp shot like that one day of smoke... but we'll just have to wait and see!

L8s, latex and all that love stuff

nathizz

Triple the Groping of Mus Musculus

Translation: 3 Blind Mice

Description: Like the old nursery rhyme, but with a huge twist. dum dum dum!!!! It's also a story not a poem... I am not feeling creative currently! (an attempt at using random words to make me intelligent or appear so)

Story: A day that started out non-quixotically actually stayed quite temperate. The morning was pretty standard. I woke up, got ready, went to school, and came home. When I arrived at home my housemate was sitting at his computer. He had his left leg on his chair and then other touching the floor, the usual position he sits in. The difference about today, though, was that he turned and said something that I was not expecting. With his twangy country tone, and fast speech, he said "We have mice, eh?" I froze still and was not sure what to think. After a second or two or, okay fine probably, 5 seconds, I took two steps back (no not 5 steps) and asked him what happened and how he knew that? He replied that they had just killed three of them. Two in the basement and one on the first floor. Tres interesante. Who would have thunk? Not I. We then decided that we would set up a bunch of mousetraps everywhere around the house... and just make sure that they are all dead. No dead mice in my walls... that's for sure. I went to my room.

After doing homework, I went back to school to go to English class. One word for this class... STUPID, but we had an exercise that I thoroughly enjoyed. We had to spend 10 minutes just writing... creatively on what the snow outside reminded us of. I like it. After english I made my way to the weekly thursday afternoon 'get-a-way'.

Grandview the place I spend my thursday afternoons to evenings. What joy it is, well sometimes. I stayed I used moviemaker, I wrote out plans for youth, and then headed to Waterloo. Once in Waterloo, I picked the Nit up and we went to McD's. Got my Combo 6 and we headed to his place. Once I was done eating dinner I headed back to Grandview for vocal practice. Eeekers, my voice was not up to the task of singing those tenor notes and so, apparently, I began singing alto. I had no clue and was quite excited when one of my fellow vocalists articulated it to me. WOOT WOOT! It was done I was out of there 1 hr before I had scheduled.

I got home and the 4th mouse was just killed. I missed it... DANG! I talked to friends, picked and dropped a friend and their female buddy off at their respective homes and was going to get my caffienated beverage, but then I forgot so i went home and struggled with homework. I ended the day with 24. It has become my "midnight snack" if you will. I LOVE IT! Okay, C4C time...

L8s, Latex, and all that love stuff
n8 da gr8

Changing in front of others

So, today has been different. I was actually doing work the first week of school, but I'm already stressing about it all. For those who said bible college was like sunday school... man no not at all! I had 3 classes yesterday, and I have so much work already that is all do at least by next week. I can't skip a class, eventhough right now I feel as though I wouldn't mind skipping tomorrow and sleeping.

Going through change is crazy. I feel like everything around me is just going at a steady pace, but I'm just walking just a little faster than everyone else. But with that in mind... I'm saying bye to some and hello to those in front of me. I've been reading about how when God wants us to do something for him and we doubt, it just stops us from what He truly wants. I don't ever wish that upon myself, but I do feel that I have been acting in that way. I'm constantly doubting the changes he has planned for me. And in this way He can't use me in the fullest way possible. It upsets me. I know some that are willing to give it all and actually let it happen. I want to, but feel like I need to control it because I'm afraid of how it'll end up working out.

I just spent the past 4 months getting used to one type of life. It was living at home, working all the time, and not really hanging with my friends. But this semester is all about living away from home close to my friends, going to school, no job, and trying to get it all sorted out. I want to spend as much time with friends as I can and want to be able to have enough money to do whatever. But my days just seem to be filled up more and more with other things... things that make me feel like I'm being trapped. Like others have already figured out what they want out of me. I want to break the chains and finally see that I am not living under someone else's wants and needs, but under God's.

As I leave to work on English, I send this your way... A Spotlight on Critical Skills in Essay Writing helps procrastination.

L8s, latex and all that love stuff
N8 the gr8

At a new beginning...

After four months of figuring things out, working three jobs, and taking two courses at school... today was my first day at a new place. I've left the University of Guelph and have begun strolling down this new path of mine. This path where I know someone is walking by my side smiling... getting my education at Heritage College full-time.

It's a scary thing when, you are older than the rest of the students starting their time in the post-secondary experience, but I know that I will live a more fulfilling life with all these connections that are at my reach for what I want to do. I'm excited and yet so scared, it's not a doubt type of scared, but a scared that I want to be able to drown myself in absorbing as much as I can and just grow with knowledge and experience.

The hard part about all of this is what I feel are obligations: friends, church events, family, and just the overall helping people out. I enjoy it all, but I feel that some assume that since I'm around I will be involved with anything they need me to do. It doesn't work like that anymore. I have school, something I've been wanting to do with my life for so long and it's finally happening. I don't want to pass up this opportunity for others that think that they know best.

Other than that, I'm really pumped for tomorrow. It's my first day of classes. I have Intro to Canadian Sociology, English Composition, NT Survey, Global Outreach Strategies, and Intro to Theology. They are definitely not like the courses I have taken in the past (science credits), so it should be good I have a lot of reading I need to get done... it's 9 books for the 5 courses... CARAZAY! The awesome part is that I only have school tuesdays and thursdays... I hope I can do well with sitting through all of the classes and not be a distraction.... because "it's been a while" as Matt Good would say in his song "It's been a while since I was your man"

G'day.... L8s, latex, and all that love stuff!