I don't know... I'm just at that stage. Where I have all of my pieces. I have collected them all... I just need help to put them together... I know what needs to be done and where it needs to be done and who needs to do it and why it needs to be done, but I just don't know how it will be done. Like to what extent will all this be happening? How many tests and trials will be given? Why is this all happening to me so quickly? Can I actually give it all to God? Can He actually take it off my shoulders? "Why another day? why another sunrise?" (Daisy - SFoot)
Man I just have so much to think about and don't feel like the energy to type it all out. I'm at that crossroads moment where I don't know. It's like the signs have been swapped, but I feel as if I know that they are, but am not 100% sure. If that analogy makes any sense, then good! Tonight was the last CCC meeting of the year and I just feel like I could have done more to get to know people to have become a member and not an attender. I don't know. This is so hard. I'm not even graduating and still I feel like wow... it's time for my life to move on. In a way I'm right because some people are and that means I have to deal with change and move on from where I am. I was reading last night from www.mclakeland.com that "change is inevitable. EPIC change is optional!"
That's what I want. I don't want something that is garunteed to happen with everyone else. I want something big to happen... and I wanna be apart of it in any way possible. Just as long as I know I helped I would be good. I don't know if that's losing my concentration on God and more on my own desires, but if I wanted change that would be pleasing to God... wouldn't he be happy and proud? I don't know, but yeh.. that's all I got... I really need to find someone here who I can just have those one on ones with and get their thoughts on the things I've been thinking about. because God's Plan A is People! So yeh.... goodnight and goodluck as well..
...l8s, latex, and all that love stuff
1 comment:
Wowza...I don't know if your just "deep" or if you've gone "over the deep end"! Stop thinking so much and just do. I think you'll find that God will put opportunities in your life at every turn...it's more a matter of taking part than over-thinking the issue. For example, you're crazy weekend was more about doing than thinking! Does that make sense?
Hey if you want to "do"...you should email Shan about helping with the Starfish Dinner at church on April 7th. I'm taking the whole day off to cook, clean, decorate, etc. Think about it.
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